Holywell
March 30, 1850
My Dearest John,
I received your note on the 27th instant and am
glad to hear that you are quite well as it leaves your Lizzy at present thank
God for as you will doubtly be surprised to hear that I am in Holywell, but I
am, dear, since five weeks I am quite unsettled yes. My father has not got better, no no, never
will he. The man has __ __. No my poor father is still in a weak
state. We think to give the house up in
Flint. What do you think, dearest? I can persuade my brothers not to give it
up. I think they keep asking me what I
think about it so I shall have your opinion on the subject and let me know as
soon as possible.
My dearest John the day is Good Friday and my brother has
gone to Bangor for a trip and I am left alone and I can avail myself in writing
to you. I could do nothing better than
write to the only one that I love in
this world. My dearest, I should of
written to let you know that I was in Holywell, but have been so busy. I have my father’s house to attend to and my
brothers and I have to serve in the shop as well so you see they keep me in
full employment all the time. Brother
came to fetch me without me knowing that I want to go. He told me I might as well be with him as at
home but I should not of gone if you were in Flint but there is no one I care
for in Flint therefore all places are alike for me.
My dearest John I am very low today and it is enough to make
anyone low that has any feeling I think that this time last year you were in
your native place, now where are you?
You are in a land of strangers and your Lizzy here pineing. Oh my dearest John it was a sin that we were
ever separated but tis done now – but:
Though the hills may now divide
And the waters angry roar
Consolation dwells beside me
When we meet to part no more
Yes dearest it may be our lot to meet again and oh I often picture in
my mind our meeting. Oh would not our
meeting me a happy one. Do you think we shall ever meet again dearest? Oh where should I be now was it not for hope?
Yes, I have a hope of one day meeting
with my dearest John. Whether that time
is far off or near I am not able to say.
But if it should not be out lot to meet again on earth, oh may we meet
on the right hand of God. That will be a
happy meeting where there is no sickness or sorrow, no weeping after or pineing
after those we love there. No, all tears
shall be wiped from our eyes and we shall sing the song of the Lamb of God that
died to redeem us.
My dearest John I have but little news to tell you this time but I
shall try to see what I have got to say.
I hope and trust that by this time you have received my for I wrote that
same week I received it and I have worked you a card and sent it in it so
should not like the letter to become lost.
My dearest John I dream a very singular dream about you. Sometime back here I dreamt that you had some
home and you came to our house first before going near home and you had a __
with you and I thought you looked so tall and the top of your head was as black
as jet and it was curled and the end of the curls that hung down were as white
as white could make them and I thought that I was afraid to go near you and you
asked me did I not know you and I said I did & you asked me to come and
fulfill my promise. What promise say
I? You promised to be mine you
said. Oh but I did not think you would
of gone so ugly and your hair white too & I thought you burst out of crying
and said well and have I suffered all this for you Lizzy and you won’t have me
after all but you know you promised faithfully to be mine and I thought I
jumped to you and said so I will be your dear John for I could not bear to see
you cry and I thought you staid yonder for a great while and I went with you
home. My dearest John I hope and I
trust that you are not grieving – no don’t grieve my dear John. Recollect that there is a Lizzy that would
take all your trouble if she know how so don’t let your Lizzy beg of you not
for if I know you were grieving I should be more miserable than I am.
Walter has had a good misfortune in the __ his arm is broke poor
man. I wrote to William to __ the letter
to Holywell and I had it last Wednesday and do you know the glass belonging is
that pretty Valentine was broke all to pieces.
I could not of thought that there were such pretty Valentines in
America. My dearest John I must now
thank you kindly for it – this is not how we used to thank one another no. Kisses were our payments were they not? Yes but we must bid adieu to kisses for a
while such as we need to give for I shall send you one on paper if you will __
of one or more.
My dearest John I left this off since Friday night for my brother came
home before I expected him and two __ __ with him so I had to get tea for them directly
and I went home Saturday night it was half past 7 o’clock when I started for we
were busy In the shop the servant came to send me a little of the way but
before I got half way I was dripping wet so I called at your house for the
__ umbrella for I did not think they
would know me for Mary Ellen came to the door.
I had never spoken to her before but she made me come in and I went into
the parlour. She fetched your Mother and
I had spoken to her before. Oh! my dear John I was grieved that I went there for
your poor mother burst a crying as soon as she seen me but I told her she must
not grieve that she would be injuring herself and it would not bring you back
any sooner. They wanted me to stop all
night but I told them it was easier to open people’s mouths than to shut them
for no one knew I was there. Mary Ellen
came to send me to the beddal but to tell the truth I was timid after she left
me. My dear John, have I done right or
wrong in going there. If I have, tell me
my dearest John.
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